


Gray Tomatoes

by StarHelio



Series: Vampire AU [3]
Category: Voltron: Legendary Defender
Genre: Crack, Voltron, here u go i guess, i found this from over a year ago in my folders, keith - Freeform, lance - Freeform, vampire keith, vld
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-07-24
Updated: 2019-07-24
Packaged: 2020-07-12 12:28:55
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 369
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/19946179
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/StarHelio/pseuds/StarHelio
Summary: Literally crack on paper about Lance and Keith in a Walmart and Keith is also a vampire?





	Gray Tomatoes

“Oh no, oh no, oh noooooooo” Lance whined as he fumbled around all the gray tomatoes in the produce bin, (it was making a really loud rumbling sound, all those tomatoes. He just kept tossin’ ‘em around like he owned the place- or all the tomatoes- and it sounded like a baby thunder in that tomato bin. Like, it was so loud and he was reaching over real far, gangly limbs and all, so that was a sight to see) causing somewhat of a scene unbeknownst to him, but when has Lance been known not to cause a scene? He huffed as he whirled around and pushed his shopping cart along angrily as he scoured the aisles until he found just the person (or close enough to a person) he was looking for. “Keith!” Lance shouted in a hushed tone, trying and failing miserably to be discreet. Everyone was side-eyeing Lance anyway, seeing as he was being horrendously loud and obnoxious in their good, quiet, Walmart. Though they knew it couldn’t entirely be Lance’s fault, seeing as how according to the way he walked, the direction his hair grew, and the migration pattern of the last bird he saw, they knew - he was a millennial, and they are prone to destroy everything - even the peace and quiet of a sanctified walmart- though maybe that was entirely his fault. Susan decided she’d go grab some mayonnaise to come back with and ask the young man’s opinion on it. That would truly prove how much of a corrupted millennial he was. Lance scuttled over to a very apathetic-faced vampire who only greeted him with a raised brow. “Keith! Why are all the tomatoes gray?” Lance hissed quietly like an angered mother trying to pry an explanation from her snot-nosed brat of a child. “I…was hungry.” Keith answered calmly, albeit a bit confused. “Keith, that’s like basically eating the tomatoes for you! That’s basically stealing, Keith!”   
“But the tomatoes still taste the same to you guys?”  
“Well, yeah! But who wants to eat gray tomatoes?”  
“Well, I think they’re still beautiful even if they are gray.”  
“Your opinion is biased you pale, tomato-sucking hoe.”  
“Ouch. Wow. I’m wounded. I really am.”


End file.
